tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-88227340210234186152024-02-07T07:44:09.127-05:00Finding GodI started this blog as forum for expressing how I find God in my everyday life. My hope is that other people will participate and write about where they find God, also. Please feel free to post even if it's only a few words. Anywhere you find God is an inspiration to us all.obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.comBlogger409125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-39048892253859659422023-03-24T06:30:00.000-04:002023-03-24T06:30:38.007-04:00Attention<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Friday, March 24, 2023.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was getting my coffee this morning and saw the mug I gave Jeff at Christmas sitting there; the one with the picture of him with his arm over his mom’s shoulders standing in front of the Sound in the Outer Banks.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I thought how much I miss her hugs.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She gave the best hugs.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She truly was a mom to me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She filled in all of the places that my mom had left behind when we lost her.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She gave me attention, and I think that’s the greatest gift anyone can give.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s what we all crave.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We had such a special relationship.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She made all of us feel that way, but it was true.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She formed a special and unique relationship with each of us.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">One that made each of us feel like her favorite.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And I think we all were.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Because she had such a big heart and so much love to give, we could all be favorites. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p><p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">As I was thinking about this, it dawned on me that that’s what makes our relationship with Jesus so special.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The attention and the love for each of us that’s unique to our relationship with Him.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Each one of us is His favorite.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Each one of us gets His undivided attention.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Being a Christian means we’re all striving to be more like Him, and though Mom was a flawed human being like the rest of us, when it came to love and attention, she set a high bar.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Thank you, Jesus, for her example in my life.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Help me to keep reaching for that bar.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Amen. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-39065135646741584602022-11-16T07:28:00.000-05:002022-11-16T07:28:48.824-05:00Paths<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Wednesday, November 16, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Just hours after I wrote my post yesterday, I got a call moving my appointment up to just two weeks away.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">God at work in my life again.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It got me thinking of how I got to this point.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I read that with this infection the sooner it’s discovered and treated, the better your chances of limiting lung damage. Mine was discovered through a CT scan of my heart.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The scan was done because an EKG showed that my heartbeat was low-voltage.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My heart was being checked to see if it was the cause of my fatigue.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My heart was perfectly healthy, but they saw the tiny spot on my lung which grew rapidly and brought me to where I am now.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So through a roundabout path God got me early treatment.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And then there’s the path that led us to where we live now which couldn’t be better for us at this point in our lives.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Before we moved to the Outer Banks, I would have never dreamed I’d be living in central North Carolina.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But living at the beach means you vacation somewhere else which is how we discovered this area.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We always thought we wanted a big piece of land and actually bought a lot to build on.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Then we decided we wanted to be mortgage-free so we bought a townhouse and sold the lot.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But after living in the townhouse, we decided we didn’t like sharing walls but we did like the perks of having our outdoor space maintained by a community association.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">That led us here.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">An individual home with a beautiful park, trees everywhere, and sidewalks for walkability.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">There is no way I could have managed getting outdoors as much as I do anywhere other than a neighborhood like this with its level sidewalks that I can use my rollator on.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">There is a line from an old Patty Loveless song “I thought I walked a twisted trail till I saw where it led me to, like a moonbeam across the water, I came straight to you”.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Looking back through the years, I can see how God led me here, but the paths in my life would seem twisted if I viewed them without the eyes of my faith.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">“In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” (Proverbs 3:6 NKJV)</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Yes.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">He will.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">God is the moonbeam across the water, and He will lead you to your best life if you let Him.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Amen.</span></p><div><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px;"><br /></span></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-58833577706987159902022-11-15T07:35:00.000-05:002022-11-15T07:35:04.553-05:00My Guiding Light<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Tuesday, November 15, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I have a MAC lung infection.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I just read more about it, and I wish I hadn’t.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was diagnosed in the weeks after the bronchoscopy I had on October 7th, but I couldn’t get an appointment with a pulmonologist who deals with these things till February.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">They’re trying to get me in sooner, but part of what’s happening now is they’re trying to find which antibiotics will treat this.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Apparently, there are many strains and it’s quite a long process to nail down which antibiotics will work.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Once they do, I will probably be on two or three antibiotics for up to a year.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The side effects from them can be pretty awful, and I’ll need continual testing to know when the infection is gone.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">In the meantime, the infection itself can possibly cause significant lung damage.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Those are among the things I wish I hadn’t read.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">How am I going to get through this?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was getting scared and upset when a line from a prayer I say every day to my guardian angel popped into my head.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">“Protect me from every influence of Satan that I may not fall into sin.”</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">(Of course, it didn’t just pop into my head.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">God was comforting me.)</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I don’t think worry is a sin, but I do think that it’s Satan’s influence that can steal our joy.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And I’m not going to let that happen.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I don’t know anything for sure yet, and worrying isn’t going to help at all.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Jesus says, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:34 NIV).</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So I’m going to do my best to take each day as it comes and enjoy this time before the treatment starts.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And who knows? Maybe the treatment won’t be that bad.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But even if it is, I’m going to draw my strength and my hope from Jesus.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">“…Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning.” (Psalms 30:5 NKJV)</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Praying, talking with Jesus, and drawing comfort from my Bible are the things that will get me through anything.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I might temporarily stumble because I’m human, but I’ll always find my way back with Him as my guiding light.</span></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-35987162548108640032022-11-06T06:37:00.000-05:002022-11-06T06:37:17.377-05:00Grief<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Sunday, November 6, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We’ve all heard that grief comes in waves.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It washes over you, overwhelms you, and then backs off until the next surge.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Eventually, the waves don’t crash over you quite as hard, but like the ocean, grief is always there waiting to drench you again.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">What I’ve been thinking about lately is how you move on.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When we lived at the ocean, we used to walk out to see it all the time.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We’d sit and watch, entranced by it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And it was always a struggle to decide when to walk away.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">There was always one more wave that we wanted to wait for.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Obviously, we had to walk away at some point, but we always knew we could come back because the ocean is always there.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Grief is like that.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s always there, and it’s so hard to make the decision to walk away from it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">You feel like you’re leaving you’re loved one behind somehow.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But unlike the ocean, you can carry them with you.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The hard part is separating them from the grief; realizing that both can exist but they don’t need to be forever tied together.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’m certainly no expert, and I know each person grieves in their own way.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But when I was praying about how to move forward after losing Jeff’s mom, God put this image on my heart.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We lost my mom seven years ago yesterday, so I think this week in November will always be a difficult one for us in the years ahead.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was able to think of my mom without it tearing me apart at some point, and I know we’ll get there with Jeff’s mom, too.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My moms didn’t have the opportunity to know each other too well here on earth, but I’m hoping they’re having a grand time up in heaven.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I know I’ll see them again someday.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">In the meantime, I’ll carry them both in my heart as I slowly walk away from those waves. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-90001906207348119762022-11-02T08:32:00.001-04:002022-11-02T08:32:56.852-04:00Mom<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Wednesday, November 2, 2022. A light in the world went out last night. Jeff’s mom died, and I’m heartbroken. We all are. She asked me to call her Mom when we got married twenty-two years ago, and she’s truly been a mom to me in every sense of the word. Her death was unexpected. She had a severe ulcerative colitis attack which then turned into sepsis. She went into the hospital in the early hours of Friday morning and quickly deteriorated. She had just called me the day before just to chat. She hadn’t been feeling well but was doing better that day. I had no idea it would be my last conversation with her, but I’m so glad I got to tell her I loved her. She was the heart of the family. People were everything to her. When I met Jeff and brought my two kids into the family, she welcomed them as her own grandchildren. She never made them feel like there was a “step” between them. She was a gifted pianist and studied at Juilliard. It was because of her that I found my love of classical music. We also shared a love of books, jigsaw puzzles, and crafting. She was always making things to give us. She excelled at knitting, sewing, cross-stitching… We all have evidence of her love sprinkled throughout our homes. She was a great cook and baker. Her pies were legendary; the highlight of Thanksgiving dinner. And she was always, always there for you offering her support and her friendship. We’d talk for hours on end when she visited and drink endless cups of tea. She made the effort to connect so you always knew how much she cared. I just can’t imagine the world without her in it. She will be sorely missed. I love you, Mom. Rest in peace. </p><p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-80036621881537251592022-10-31T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-31T05:00:00.196-04:00Galatians 6:9<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Sunday, October 30, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I saw this verse in one of my devotionals yesterday, and it struck me in a different way than usual.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Always before, I’ve thought of it as far as my actions in the bigger world - being kind to others, standing up for what’s right - that type of thing.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But yesterday I related to it on a more personal level.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve been struggling with weight gain since I began dealing with M.E.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">You can’t exercise with this illness or you will make it much worse.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve always tried to eat healthy, but when you are forced to be still so much, the pounds just start gradually creeping up.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My weight had leveled off and I had made my peace with it thinking there’s not much I could do.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But then it started to go up again, and I worried that it wouldn’t stop. I’ve talked about acceptance with consideration to our physical looks, but I also believe you have to do your best for your health.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And I didn’t think it was healthy for my weight gain to go unchecked.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So this time, I decided to focus on my weight loss as a critical need for my physical health.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve read that inflammation can make any chronic illness worse, so I decided to shoot for an anti-inflammatory diet.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When I researched it, I came across a short video clip by Dr. Andrew Weil talking about which foods are the most anti-inflammatory.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">In it, he said one short sentence that stuck with me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">“If you want to lose weight, cut out flour and sugar”.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So simple and straightforward.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I knew I could do that.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And guess what?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It worked.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve watched my calories before, but with the sugar and flour, even watching calories wasn’t cutting it for me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">As soon as I took those out, I started to lose weight and feel a little better overall.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Seeing progress always strengthens my resolve, but with the holidays looming, I started thinking about all of the foods that come with them.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Pies at Thanksgiving and cookies at Christmas; I worried that I couldn’t stick with my plan.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Then I saw that verse, and it spoke to me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It was like God Himself reaching out and saying, “You can do this.”</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I will reap the harvest of my efforts if I don’t let myself grow weary and give up.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I am weary in so many ways these days, but I can be strong in this with God’s help.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Yes.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Thank you, Jesus. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p><div><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px;"><br /></span></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-26639791875810610812022-10-30T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-30T05:00:00.192-04:00Halloween Memories<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;">Saturday, October 29, 2022. I loved Halloween when I was a kid, but it was a little different back then. We carved pumpkins using basic shapes like triangles and circles, and tried to make jagged-looking teeth without cutting one of them off. (Inevitably, I had to reattach one with a toothpick.) Nowadays, so many of them look like artwork. Not that that’s a bad thing. I’m amazed at what people can do, and I love looking at the intricate designs. But it is different. My mom used to roast the pumpkins seeds, and I loved them! I tried doing it for my kids one year, and I never did it again. It’s hard work separating the seeds from that pumpkin gunk! I had no idea the effort Mom put in till I tried it myself. Then there’s the costumes. If you bought one in a store, it came with a hard plastic mask with an elastic band that went around the back of your head. There were three problems with those plastic masks: one, that elastic band cut into your ears; two, the condensation created from trying to breathe in them made them all wet inside; and three, no peripheral vision. Trying to see out of those little eyeholes was definitely a challenge. The other option was to make one up with stuff around the house. My favorite costume was when I put a sheet over my head and cut two holes for the eyes. I have no idea why I was so excited about it - maybe because of Charlie Brown’s Halloween? I don’t know, but it was simple and fun, and I loved it. Again, I love seeing the elaborate costumes people wear now, but it definitely takes more effort. We used to use pillow cases to collect our candy, and we’d get so much that we had to make drop-offs two or three times because they got too heavy to carry. It was a blast! I know some people talk about Halloween as “the devil’s holiday”, and that’s sad. We gave no thought to anything other than having fun, and I think that’s what most people are doing today. Whether you do Halloween simple or elaborate, if your kids are excited and having fun, then God is there. I know He was there as I was racing around the neighborhood having the time of my life. </p><div><br /></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-67852099436844548372022-10-29T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-29T05:00:00.182-04:00The Church Bell<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Friday, October 28, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My dad grew up in the small village of Karitsa, way up in the mountains in Greece.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It was still a true village when we visited in the sixties and seventies - no running water in the house, outhouse, and minimal electricity, if I remember right.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I seem to recall a lightbulb hanging from the ceiling, but I’m not sure.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Definitely no heating or air conditioning.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">This was also before computers, smartphones, etc.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So kids found lots of creative ways to amuse themselves.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The centerpiece of the village was a big church with a large courtyard and a bell tower.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The bell tower was outside of the church proper with a thick, heavy rope hanging down to be rung for services.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">One day, my sister and I were playing with the village kids in the courtyard when someone decided we should try to ring the bell.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Unbeknownst to us, this was strictly forbidden.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So all of us kids gathered around, taking turns hanging from the rope and trying to make the bell ring.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We spoke Greek pretty fluently at the time, but I remember not really understanding all that was being said about our little activity… until kids started taking off.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Rita and I were looking around watching children run for the hills and wondering what the problem was when we heard a shout.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I looked behind me and saw a man in a black robe looking really angry and heading our way.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">That’s all it took!</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I yelled “Run!” and took off hoping she was behind me but too afraid to check.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">At that point, it was every man for himself.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I remember ducking behind something - a large rock maybe - and watching that scary man stomping for the bell tower and spewing a torrent of Greek.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I don’t remember what happened after that.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I know we didn’t get caught and eaten alive because we’re both still here.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I thought God would punish us somehow because it seemed we had done a terrible thing at the time based on that man’s reaction.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But no, God just gave me another great adventure - and taught me not to trust those crazy kids anymore!</span></p><div><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px;"><br /></span></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-26388528988867241342022-10-28T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-28T05:00:00.227-04:00Rest<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Thursday, October 27, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Why do we find it so hard to rest these days?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">God built the Sabbath right into the week so that we would rest, and yet we still resist it. It’s one of the things I struggled with the most when this illness claimed me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">CFS/ME forces you to rest or suffer horrible consequences.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’m better than I used to be because now I stop before I’m literally paralyzed with fatigue.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Now I just feel like I’m getting the flu complete with body aches, sore throat, the whole shebang.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">(Side thought - where the heck did the word “shebang” come from?)</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But at first, when I wasn’t being productive, I was struggling with feeling worthless.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">That’s what our society has done to us.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">You’re supposed to go, go, go, 24/7 to prove your worth.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Hobbies?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Forget hobbies.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Unless you turn it into a business, what’s the point of a hobby?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Take a whole day off?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Well, have you earned it?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Playing with your child?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Are you teaching them something at the same time?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">For goodness sakes, can we just stop?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Can we breathe a minute without it having to mean something, be something other than just a breath?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I have to say that out of everything this illness has taken from me, the one thing I’ve gotten back is the ability to rest without guilt.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">At least, most of the time.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When I start to equate my worth with my lack of productiveness, I remind myself that I’m a child of God.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">That my value with Him doesn’t have anything to do with how much I can pack into a day.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I just have to love Him, and do my best to be a good person.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And guess what? After that, I can rest. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p><div><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px;"><br /></span></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-2353053919451876442022-10-27T06:42:00.002-04:002022-10-27T06:42:38.067-04:00My Mom<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Thursday, October 27, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Today would have been my mom’s 90th birthday.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She was an amazing woman.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She grew up in a very different world from today.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She was the second to youngest of seventeen children, and she told us she used to stand on a stool to reach the stove so she could cook breakfast for everyone.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Crazy, right?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But with a family that large, everyone had to pitch in.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">People learned true life skills back then.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She was an excellent seamstress.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She used to make fancy dresses for herself, and me and my sister. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She was drop-dead gorgeous but also strong as all get-out and not afraid of hard work.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She tended the garden; she made repairs around the house; she helped with the cows and chickens when we moved to the country.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She and my dad cleared an entire hillside of trees by hand.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She was incredibly smart, too.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She taught herself Greek when she met my dad.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And then when I was in my late teens, she started having health issues.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She began a slow decline over the next couple of decades, and then was never the same.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It felt like I lost her long before she was actually gone.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I miss my mom, but I’m so thankful God blessed me with her, and I’m so grateful to have known the incredible person she was before the illness took her.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ll see you whole and beautiful again someday, Mom.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Happy Birthday. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-13216047956221355892022-10-26T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-26T05:00:00.189-04:00“Thy Will Be Done”<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Tuesday, October 25, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">What do you do when something is eating at you?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Whether it’s an incident in your past, something you’re dealing with in the present, or a future worry, we all have things that weigh on our minds.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Things that we just can’t seem to get out of our heads.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">What works for me is this short prayer - “Thy will be done”, which is part of The Lord’s Prayer, of course.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The first time I remember using it to ease my mind was due to an incident many years ago with a neighbor that caused me a lot of worry.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It stands out for me because it was the first time that I clearly remember relying on God by repeating “Thy will be done” over and over.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s funny because I can’t for the life of me remember what the incident was, but I can still see myself fretting.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I can feel the tension I had that just would not let me go.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I had always had faith in God, but my relationship with Him had changed by that point, largely due to this blog.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Taking time each day to look for Him had brought me closer to Him.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I had stopped relying on myself and started turning to Him in everything.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So when this thing happened (whatever it was), I decided to pray the prayer that never fails - “Thy will be done”.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I prayed more specifically, too, but I needed something to fill my mind and drown out the stressful thoughts.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Something short and to the point, that I could play in my head on an endless loop.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It took a couple days, but it worked.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s like each time I said the prayer, it filled a negative spot in my head with a positive one; eventually coloring in my whole being with God’s peace and light.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Since then, I’ve used it whenever I need to silence the chattering in my brain. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">“Thy will be done, Thy will be done”… It brings you closer and closer to Him, and further and further from your stress.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">God’s Word and God’s will - nothing can stand against it. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-47522898873543892252022-10-24T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-24T05:00:00.190-04:00The Redbud Tree<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Sunday, October 23, 2022. My world is pretty small these days. It mostly consists of what I see out of my windows. We have a small sitting area that we call our “tea room” with two big windows that look out on the courtyard, and from there I watch the world. The star of the courtyard is a Redbud tree. When we were moving in, my first thought was to take the tree down because it seemed just slightly too big for the courtyard. My sister and I were talking about it as we sat at the kitchen table while my husband and nephew were still bringing in some boxes. Keep it? Cut it down? Then we saw the most interesting bird in the tree. I had never seen that type of bird before even though it’s pretty common in this area. I found out later it was an Eastern Towhee - black, orange, and white. He was so close! Just a few feet away because the tree is right by the window. We had such fun watching him that I decided right then that the tree would stay. Definitely the right decision, and I think it was God’s way of preparing for my current situation. I’ve seen so many different kinds of birds in that tree. I’ve watched squirrels scamper all over it. I watch the seasons change in its leaves and flowers. Just yesterday morning I was thinking of how we can always know what time of year it is just by looking at that tree. That afternoon, Jeff said exactly the same thing as we sat together watching the late afternoon sunlight filter through its golden autumn leaves. Once all the leaves fall and the branches are bare, Jeff hangs red and silver decorations on it for Christmas. In spring, it puts on a glorious show with pink flowers and new leaves that emerge yellow; the pink and yellow together are just glorious. Then the fullness of summer takes over with broad, deep green, heart-shaped leaves. God knows our future. He knew I would be spending the majority of my days sitting in this exact spot, and He gave me that Redbud tree so that I could still experience the beauty and wonder of His natural world. Thank you, Jesus. </p><div><br /></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-31650921886313277122022-10-23T05:00:00.004-04:002022-10-23T05:00:00.227-04:00Chicken Of The Sea<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Saturday, October 22, 2022. I mentioned eating caviar a few days ago, but that wasn’t the ickiest thing I’ve ever eaten - it was frog legs! Where on earth my mom got frog legs, I’ll never know, but she fried them up and coaxed us into eating them. She kept telling us they were “chicken of the sea”. I was super skeptical, but it did look like a really small chicken drumstick, so I finally took a bite. And guess what? It was really good! It really did taste like chicken. Haha!! When I finally found out what it was, I almost died, and there is no way I will ever eat it again no matter how good it is. Some people are open to that kind of thing - I’m not one of them. But as I said, my mom was a great cook so she even made frog legs taste good to me. God put so many wonderful foods in the world for us to eat, and at this point in my life, I can only tolerate a small portion of them. Though “chicken of the sea” will never be included in that list, it still gives me and my sister a good laugh when we remember it, and that’s where I find God in this little story (but not in frog legs!). </p><div><br /></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-9095100505191848712022-10-22T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-22T05:00:00.194-04:00Aging<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Friday, October 21, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">They say aging isn’t for sissies, and boy, is that ever true.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When I was young, I thought I’d handle aging well once it was time to be old.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The problem is in your mind, you don’t feel any different.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Yes, you gain experience and wisdom, but you still feel like yourself; like the person you were decades ago.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So in your mind, it’s never “time to be old”.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Then one day, you notice some sagging, or some wrinkles, or grey hair, and at first, you think, “Okay, I can handle this”, because you think that’s all there is to it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But it doesn’t stop, it keeps going until you look in the mirror and don’t recognize yourself.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve come to realize that aging is learning to recognize yourself in that slowly declining physical state over and over.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">You have to see past what’s in the mirror to what’s inside of you.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Here is where faith comes into play.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">God sees us on the inside.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">He’s seen us since before we were born into this world.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">None of what the world sees on the outside matters to Him, it’s just the trappings we get caught up in during our brief stint here.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’m not saying you should just totally let yourself go.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I think we should take care of the bodies God has given us to the best of our ability.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But that doesn’t mean being ageless.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I mean can you imagine being eighty and still looking like you did at twenty?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s silly but somehow still a struggle.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s definitely a test of faith to find yourself in a face you don’t recognize, but maybe that’s what we need as we age.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It truly is a privilege to get old when so many don’t.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Maybe the point is to strengthen our faith and accept what a blessing it is, wrinkles and all.</span></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-41584848587493150642022-10-21T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-21T05:00:00.193-04:00The Unknown <p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Thursday, October 20, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Fear is often based in the unknown.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve been dealing with that a lot lately.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When the nodules in my lung were first found, I was afraid of cancer.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Now that I know for sure it’s not cancer, I’m afraid of just how bad this infection is.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The doctor said it could take several weeks for the cultures they took in the bronchoscopy to produce results.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So until then, there’s no way to know exactly how to treat it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve read that sometimes you need to take antibiotics for as long as a year, and that they can cause serious side effects.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">More fear.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Maybe my infection isn’t that bad; there’s no way to know till I get those results.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So unknown = fear.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But there is One who knows exactly what’s going on with me, and He tells me to trust Him.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s really hard, and it’s takes almost constant re-centering; constant prayer (Pray without ceasing. 1 Thessalonians 5:17) But when I do that, I see that He has always been there for me; He has always gotten me through.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So no matter what type of infection this is or how difficult it may be to deal with, He’ll get me through it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ll pray until He calms my fear.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Prayer = peace.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My future is unknown to me, but there is no “unknown” to God.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And since I know God, that’s good enough for me. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p><div><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px;"><br /></span></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-59293784871355517892022-10-20T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-20T05:00:00.196-04:00Forgiveness <p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Wednesday, October 19, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Forgiveness is probably one of the most difficult things we humans struggle with.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">As hard as it can be, I can forgive most things done to me, but do something to my children?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">That’s a whole other story.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Even though they’re both grown adults, I still find it hard to forgive anyone who has hurt them at any point in their lives.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">From their childhood through today, I can see with glaring intensity the times they were hurt and it still feels like a punch to the gut.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I want to go back and start ripping limbs; not very Christian, I know, and therein lies the struggle.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Jesus tells us to forgive.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And now I wonder if He does that more for us than for the person we’re forgiving.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">He knows that anger can eat you up inside, and He loves us so much that He doesn’t want that for us.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">He wants us to live peaceful, happy lives, and how can you do that if you’re holding onto negative feelings?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But He also knows we’re human, so when we go to that dark place in our hearts, He provides a light; a way back.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">That’s what I reach for when I’m struggling to forgive, and ultimately, that light fills me till there’s no more room for the darkness.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I find peace again.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The more time goes on, the less a particular incident rears its ugly head, but whenever it does, He promises to be there for us over and over again.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">No matter how much we need, He’s there to give it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">He forgives us because He loves us. He shines His light on the path out of the darkness, we just need to follow it. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-45912332729896538862022-10-19T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-19T05:00:00.188-04:00Greek School<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Tuesday, October 18, 2022. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When I was in elementary school, my parents made me attend Greek School for a few years.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I hated it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s bad enough to have to go to school every day, but to go to more school afterwards?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">What were they thinking?!</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I didn’t know anyone, I never made any friends, and the teacher seemed very stern to me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But guess what?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I learned the Greek alphabet and how to read and write the language, and I can still read it to this day.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It helped me so much in “regular” school though I didn’t realize it at the time.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">All of that is well and good, but my very favorite memory of Greek School had nothing to do with learning Greek.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We lived close to the elementary school so I always walked home.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">One day it was raining, and I was walking home with my super cool, see-through bubble umbrella.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">(They went out of fashion for a while, and I have no idea why.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">They were the best!) I was getting close to home when I saw my mom coming to pick me up in the car.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I guess I was running late.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I remember I was cold so it was great to get into the warm car, but even better than that was the food Mom had brought me to eat on the drive.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My mother was the best cook in the world.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She was born in the South but learned Greek cooking when she met my dad, and everyone said she cooked Greek food better than native Greeks.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">One of our favorite things that she made was stuffed tomatoes, and on that cold rainy day, Mom had brought me still warm stuffed tomatoes wrapped in foil.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">To this day, I think it’s the best thing I ever ate in my life.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It warmed me inside and out. Ever since, Greek School and those stuffed tomatoes have been linked in my mind.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And in my heart?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I see God there in my mom warming me as only a mother can.</span></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-67142544761371913332022-10-18T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-18T05:00:00.192-04:00Isaiah 41:10<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Monday, October 17, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I can’t tell you how many times I’ve leaned on this verse for comfort, especially in the past year.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve had to have several CT scans in the past few months which for me is like torture because I’m claustrophobic.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Yes, they say it’s fairly open nowadays, except to me, it’s not. It’s so close; it’s right in your face, and you’re supposed to stay perfectly still which somehow makes it worse, and did I mention that it’s right in your face?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I tell myself I could scoot out if I really had to, but that doesn’t seem to help.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So I try to put my mind elsewhere by praying and repeating Bible passages over and over, mainly, “Do not fear, for I am with you.”</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Knowing God is right there with me gets me through it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I put all of my concentration onto Him and everything going on around me falls away.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I forget that I’m in a tube that makes me feel trapped.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I forget that they’re testing to see what crazy thing is going on in my body.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I forget that it’s right in my face.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I forget to be scared - “do not fear”, to feel weak - “I will strengthen you”, to feel alone in that cold, empty tube - “I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Yes, this verse has everything when I need comfort.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Thank you, Jesus.</span></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-83484639499499836592022-10-17T05:00:00.002-04:002022-10-18T07:56:16.626-04:00Little Gifts<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Sunday, October 16, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I get sensory overload these days from the ME/CFS.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I have to look away from anything that’s fast-moving or flickering which means a lot of stuff on television, but even when I’m in the car I have to look ahead of me because looking out the side window can be too much.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I also have a problem with sounds so I can only take so much conversation before I need quiet to rest my head.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">One of the main things I miss is music.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I can listen a little if it’s the only thing playing, but I can’t tolerate it for very long while I’m doing something else.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I used to listen while I cooked, cleaned, etc., but of course I can’t do much of that anymore anyway.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">One pleasant sound I do get to enjoy these days is my chimes.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I have a capiz shell wind chime that used to hang outside.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It started falling apart, but we love it so much we didn’t want to get rid of it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So I had Jeff bring it inside and hang it near the register in our ceiling.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Now whenever the air condition or heat comes on, I get to hear its lovely tinkling sound.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s just enough to make me happy, but it doesn’t last long enough to bother me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Just little snippets of “music” throughout my day.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Little gifts from God. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-60612325473707936142022-10-16T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-16T05:00:00.184-04:00Caviar<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Saturday, October 15, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We took a couple of trips to Greece when my sister and I were kids, and we were lucky enough to travel on one of those huge transatlantic ships.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It was quite the experience.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">There was a steward who went around with what I think was a xylophone -type thing and played a tone when it was time for meals. I can’t remember a lot about the food, but I do remember caviar!</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My mom probably told us it was caviar, but when we questioned her further, I can guarantee she didn’t tell us it was fish eggs.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I remember it being black so I’m sure it took some convincing to get us to taste it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I can’t say I remember exactly what it tasted like, but I do remember the texture.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The little pops in my mouth were so much fun!</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And I know I must have liked the taste because I wanted more.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It was years into my adulthood before I realized that I had eaten caviar, and I doubt I could get myself to try it now.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I mean, come on, it’s fish eggs! Haha!</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But you know, if my mom was still here, she could probably coax me into it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I miss her.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Such an incredible, vibrant woman she was in those days.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And what fortunate children we were.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Sailing the Atlantic, eating caviar… And having such loving parents which is worth all the caviar in the world.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Thank you, Jesus. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px;"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-59045151175754124312022-10-15T05:00:00.009-04:002022-10-18T06:43:31.540-04:00The Good Doctor<div style="text-align: left;"><div><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Friday, October 14, 2022. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">One of the reasons Jeff and I moved to this area from the Outer Banks was for the great medical care all around the Triangle.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When I needed a primary care doctor, I asked a few neighbors for recommendations, but their doctors weren’t taking any more patients.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So I did what we always do nowadays, I Googled it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I found a practice with UNC that sounded good and read reviews of some of their doctors.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Some of the doctors included a short bio and one in particular stood out, but she had no reviews.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Still I called the office to make an appointment only to be told that the first few doctors weren’t taking patients.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">They started reading off a list of available doctors and I thought I recognized a name so I said I’d go with that one.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I wasn’t really sure who it was but I had to start somewhere.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Turns out I remembered the name because she was the one who wrote such a nice bio.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My first meeting with her was very memorable because I was in the beginning of my struggles with ME/CFS and for some reason thought I could manage walking up six flights to her office.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">(I could have easily done that before this illness.)</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I hate elevators because of my claustrophobia plus we were in the middle of Covid, but it was definitely a mistake to take the stairs.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Within a few minutes of sitting down, I couldn’t move.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was alone in the office waiting for her and kept hoping it would be better by the time she got there, but it wasn’t.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">All I could do was raise a finger indicating I needed a minute.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She was patient, kind, and listened to me intently when I could finally speak.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I saw her several times after that before I found out she was still a resident and was hoping to get a permanent position nearby.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was hoping that, too, because I thought very highly of her by then.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">(She got the position, by the way.)</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">She ran through every test possible for me and stayed in close communication which is such a rare thing these days.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And by communication, I mean she actually picks up the phone and calls me herself. </span><span style="font-family: arial;"><span>It was never more important to me than this last week when I was waiting for the results of the bronchoscopy. I kept seeing results coming in but they were so full of medical jargon I couldn’t really understand them. She called me yesterday afternoon because she was worried no one had contacted me about the results so far, and she was right. Even though all the tests aren’t back, she explained that it’s looking very likely that what I have is some type of infection, and there is no indication of cancer so far. She’s pretty confident from what she’s seen that there won’t be. I was so happy to hear that, but I was incredibly touched that she took the time to call. It’s the pulmonologist who will ultimately give me the final results since he’s the one who ordered the test so it wasn’t really her responsibility to call me, but she did it because she cares. Finding a doctor who cares, who goes out of their way to communicate with you; it’s so hard to find and it’s worth everything. You know where I found God yesterday? In a good doctor who’s worth her weight in gold.</span> </span></div></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-55917212417897969492022-10-14T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-14T05:00:00.181-04:00Crocheting Again<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Wednesday, October 12, 2022. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I started my crochet design business about four years ago, and it was growing steadily up until the summer of 2021 when this illness hit me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I managed to finish a couple of small pieces last fall but wasn’t able to get them ready to go until this past summer.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Then it took me another few months to even get one of those posted. It’s quite a process.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Crocheting is the fun part; the rest, not so much.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Writing up the pattern, taking photographs, getting it posted everywhere… it takes a lot of time and effort.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Plus, I’ve struggled with the energy to even keep my hands moving for the actual crochet work.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So I had pretty much decided that I was done.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Then a few days ago, my contact at Lion Brand Yarn got in touch asking if I had anything new.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">That was all it took to spark the desire in me to create something.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I started looking at yarn and came up with an idea.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Next step was doing a yarn request.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was doing okay until they needed to know a completion date.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s so hard to schedule anything these days because I never know how I’ll be from one day to the next.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I asked for December or January saying that I would do my best to finish by December.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was wondering if they would need to scrap the whole thing, when Mark (my contact) got back to me saying “there’s no need to rush creativity, January is fine”. I was so relieved, and so touched. They’ve always been really great to work with so I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised, but they are running a business so I kind of was.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">We live in a world where the dollar rules in so many ways.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s so encouraging to find the opposite.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Kindness, empathy, consideration… it’s all out there, even in the business world.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And I find God in that. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-63297921755003694152022-10-13T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-13T05:00:00.187-04:00Dad And The Donkey<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Tuesday, October 11, 2022. My dad has had an incredible life. He was born in Greece, lived through the war, was kidnapped by Germans, came to America and became a citizen… so many stories to tell. But the one I’m focusing on today is from a trip to Greece when I was maybe eleven years old. We were staying in his home village of Karitsa way up in the mountains, and everyone decided they wanted to take a day trip to Monevasia - even farther into the mountains. By day trip, they meant riding on horses and donkeys up a long winding trail and roasting a lamb on a spit when we got there. I don’t know how long the trip was - maybe a few hours - but I was riding a donkey and my dad was holding its lead. I remember it was a pretty narrow, rocky trail with a big drop to my left. There were several people in front of us, and I watched as they approached a rock in the trail that had a cleft in it. Each one of their horses stepped nimbly over it. I somehow knew my donkey would step into it, but I kept hoping I was wrong. I wasn’t. He stepped right into that cleft and lost his balance, and just like that me and the donkey were sliding down the mountain. The donkey was scrabbling for purchase and I was hanging on for dear life, but we never would have made it if not for my dad. He drew on strength that could only have come from God and pulled both me and that clumsy animal back up onto the trail. It scared the life out of me, and I refused to get back on any animal for the rest of the trip. I walked hours, but I would have walked days if I had to. It was an amazing place when we finally got there - a spring trickled freezing cold water straight out of the mountain, the trees at the very top bent sideways from the constant wind, and the dappled shade of the clearing where we had our feast in the forest was a beautiful natural shelter. But all of that is a small aside to the incredible feat my dad performed that day. He’s a humble man, and he never mentioned the incident unless I brought it up - probably even forgot about it. But I never did. It stands out in my memory with a bright light shining on it. I know he saved my life. And I know God was right there with him. </p><div><br /></div>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-5426037425579199132022-10-12T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-12T05:00:00.178-04:00Coffee With Jesus<p><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Tuesday, October 11, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I’ve always been a tea drinker.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I liked the taste of coffee, I just always preferred tea.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I drink my first cup of tea in the morning while I catch up on email, go through my to-do list, scroll social media, etc.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But in an effort to get a little more energy, I started having a cup of coffee after my tea.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">By this point, I’m done with screen time for a while and usually dealing with some sensory overload and a woozy head.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">So I just rest my head on my chair and sip my coffee.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">The house is quiet; I’m looking out into our courtyard watching the sky lighten and the birds and chipmunks start their day.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And in the peace of these moments, I started talking to Jesus.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It wasn’t a conscious thing at first, but now it is and I treasure it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">This illness has taken a lot from me, but it’s also given.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It’s given me time to get closer to my Savior, to increase my faith, to look for joy in the tiniest things, and for that I’m so grateful.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Coffee with Jesus - what a blessing. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8822734021023418615.post-81026284102657914192022-10-11T05:00:00.001-04:002022-10-11T05:00:00.187-04:00The Wheelchair<p> <span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Monday, October 10, 2022.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I never, never, never in a million years thought I would be a person in a wheelchair.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But when this disease sapped all of my energy, I didn’t have any choice if I still wanted to get out in the world.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And I can’t even roll myself around; I need Jeff to push me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Most of the time, I can manage with just my walker.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Again, never thought I’d need a walker.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I used a cane for a while (another thing I never thought I’d need), but things kept getting worse.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">My favorite thing to do is to take a walk outdoors and enjoy the fresh air, trees, sunshine, little birds and animals… just all of nature.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">When I couldn’t get through a walk without collapsing when I got home, I started using a cane.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Then came the walker/rollator.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was so self-conscious when I first started using it.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I didn’t want anyone to see me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Now it’s just normal to me.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">But the wheelchair isn’t.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I only use it when I’m really bad and need a dose of nature.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Even then, I feel embarrassed for some reason.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Isn’t that silly?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Part of it is that I’m physically able to walk, and I feel like if someone sees me get up from the chair and walk in the house, I’ll look like an imposter.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Again, really stupid way to feel, but there it is. The wheelchair sits just inside my front door and every time I look at it, it makes me cringe.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Until yesterday.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Yesterday, I was feeling so awful.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Along with the pain in my chest from the bronchoscopy, I was enduring all-over body aches from the ME/CFS which I know were a result of the whole hospital experience.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">It was a beautiful day.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Sunshine, cool temperatures, and I wanted so badly to take a walk, but there was no way.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">Suddenly, that wheelchair was my friend.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">I was actually excited to use it, and what a blessing it was to be able to be outside on that glorious day.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">And what a blessing to have my hero of a husband who is always willing to push me wherever I want to go.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";">God knows what we need more than we do, and I absolutely found Him in that wheelchair yesterday. </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue";"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 13.1px;"><br /></p>obxteahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14863930721146751478noreply@blogger.com0